“Patellar Tendonitis…”

 

Shared by Breanne Smedley

Ever since college, I’ve battled knee pain.

The combination of volleyball, plus my biomechanics (long legs have their downfalls, too), has resulted in what multiple doctors, physical therapists, and google searches identify as Patellar Tendonitis.

In college, it was daily physical therapy, ultrasound, ice/heat, taping, massage, and more ice. I was playing volleyball at the time, though, so whatever it took to manage the pain and play was what I did.

When I graduated, I stopped playing nearly as much. The pain improved. I was able to do most daily things with only a moderate amount of pain.

However, I just came to accept the fact that I would always have an underlying, lingering, nagging pain in my knees.

That if I chose to play volleyball (even recreationally), that I would need at least a few days of no knee bending activity after to recover.

I got used to having to sit sideways on long car rides so that I could outstretch my legs.

I just dealt with the fact that, on some days, squatting or lunging just isn’t going to happen.

That getting up and down from the ground would always require a little push off the ground, or help from a nearby chair.

But, a few months ago, after I literally couldn’t get up off the ground while holding my 20-pound daughter, I realized what I was doing.

For the past seven years since graduating, I’ve manipulated my environment, my activities, my life to keep the pain to a somewhat manageable level.

Rather than deal with the root cause, I found it easier to just avoid, modify, and accept the chronic pain.

It had become a part of my everyday life.

I also realized that I don’t want to live this way anymore.

But, transformation doesn’t happen by just changing our environment to minimize the pain.

Just like relationships aren’t healed by avoiding the person we need to confront.

Or how our Inner Critic isn’t transformed by just ignoring the voice.

My knees aren’t really going to be healed if I’m staying at surface level and changing everything except the root cause.

So, I’m starting back at square one.

Physical therapy, acupuncture, rest.

It’s going to take time, commitment, and effort.

But, so did seven years of trying to change my world to avoid the pain.

Only one way, though will lead to true transformation and freedom.

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#DaringlyResilient

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