“The love journal…”

 
Shared by Breanne Smedley

It never fails, when I’m doing some deep cleaning and decluttering, I come across boxes of memories.

Photos of Brett and I when we were kids, newspaper clippings of games that our names were mentioned in, special toys from our childhood, baseball cards, and bobbleheads (Brett).

Sometimes these things stop me in my tracks, and I spend hours reliving memories (rather than actually cleaning).

The other day, I also came across a journal from when Brett and I were dating.

We did the long-distance thing for the first three years of our relationship.

At some point during that time, we decided to start a journal to each other.

One person would write it in, drop it in the mail, then the other person would read, write back, and send it off.

I remember always looking forward to getting the mail when I thought Brett had sent the journal.

Sometimes I wouldn’t even wait to get back to my apartment to read it. Standing there by the mailbox, trying to decipher his cursive handwriting that he uses in cards or letters, and feeling that closeness and connection to him, even from miles away.

Reading through that journal, along with the dozens of cards we sent back and forth during that time, gave me feelings of nostalgia.

Yes, we could have just texted or called each other (which we did).

But there was something about a letter. Something written and thought out.

It was deeper.

When writing, I can process, articulate my thoughts, and express myself much differently than when I’m speaking.

I think it was the same for Brett.

Reading that journal also made me crave that ritual we used to have in our relationship.

Of course, our relationship has changed and evolved over the past 10 years.

It’s a beautiful, challenging, and rewarding process.
And reading that journal not only reminded me of a simpler time, it also showed me how much we’ve grown.

It was a snapshot into our lives and relationship as a young couple. Happy and free. Just longing to live in the same city together.

I’m so glad we unintentionally documented that time in our lives through written word. For us, and eventually, our kids to read one day.

Which made me think, Brett Smedley, should we bring the journal back?

In a time when we feel like we are going 100 mph, both working, coaching, taking care of Charlee, we both know how important it is to prioritize our marriage.

And how easily it can be pushed aside for the needs of Charlee, work, and the daily grind.

To take time to write to each other. Slow down. Show appreciation. Get thoughts out. Connect.

While also giving us a living archive of our relationship.

What it was like at 31 and 34 years old with a young child, building a business, taking over a football program, and teaching together.

Who knows exactly how our lives will continue to change.

One thing is for certain though:

Relationships are the foundation of accomplishment.

And my relationship with Brett is the foundation on which our family thrives.

So, for our relationship, for our memories, and for documenting the challenges, struggles, and rewards that marriage lends us…

Let’s write.

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#IntegrallyRelational

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